Wednesday, February 01, 2006

TV or not TV

Hi, my name is Velvet, and I'm a reality TV addict. I started out a few years ago with a couple of episodes of The Real World, then binged one weekend on a marathon and things have never been the same.

I could handle it in the beginning. At first I just indulged in Survivor once every seven days, but then I moved on to Big Brother and tied one of those on at least three nights a week. Before I could stop myself, I started snorting The Bachelor, and then...then The Amazing Race came along and, omigod, I was hooked! I love traveling vicariously to all those countries. I love the butterflies in my stomach when the racers are running through the airport, knapsacks banging against their backs, some contestants in tears and some shouting obscenities at each other, and they're not sure -- and neither am I -- if they'll make it onto the first flight out. What a rush!

I'm not totally over the edge, though. Fear Factor, for instance, became too hardcore a couple of seasons ago, so I won't watch it even when nothing else is on. And The Biggest Loser doesn't do anything for me. (Well, okay, I did watch the first season, but I wanted to watch it with a snack and the show kind of bummed me out.) For each new show that I muster the resolve to turn off, along comes a Project Runway or an America's Next Top Model...and then the dancing shows...and now the ice skating celebrities. Aaaaarrrrggghh! As I write these words, I'm high on American Idol, and the networks just keep on enabling me.

There is some solace in knowing that I'm not alone, that there are other dependent souls who haunt internet bulletin boards to get a "can't-wait-until-showtime" buzz. And there are actually a few real people in my life who offer understanding and support, because they're in the same sinking boat.

I may quit someday. But not now. It's in my blood, and it runs deep. In fact, I'm pretty sure it's even in my genes. Wouldn't you agree, Sis?

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